Every time I've thought about a smoke today, I get this sick feeling in my stomach. Seriously. Even typing this now - BLERK.
I've had to dig VERY deep indeed to resist the urge to hurl, and continue smoking - such determination on my behalf! You all should be well proud of me. I was actually starting to panic a little that maybe I'd defy the odds, as most my smokes seemed so gooooooood, but today's been another kettle of fish. Rotten nicotine flavoured fish - BLERK.
Anyway, Monday's the day we've nominated for total abstinence (of the nicotine variety, although in saying that, if past attempts at quitting and *ahem* mood swings are anything to go by, it'll be bloody abstinence all round), and so this weekend is my last as a smoker. I should have arranged a night on the tiles with the girls, but it's not like everyone sits round drinking and smoking at pubs anymore is it? I'll be content with sitting outside, gagging down every little inhale, and bidding a long-time friend (hmmm - possibly not a GREAT friend, but one who's seen me through the good and bad in life) goodbye...
Now excuse me. All this typing about smoking has made me retch a little, and I need to go wash my teeth and harden my resolve to have a smoke in a few minutes.
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